It is about the difference love languages that are out there and how we learn what our languages is and what our partner's language is.
Now, the book is great. There is a shortcut on the website where you can actually take a test to narrow down your love language: http://www.5lovelanguages.com/
I find this book an utterly fascinating (and quick) read. The first thing I noted was that the book states that on average the "in love" bit of a relationship is about 2 years. After that the spackle is starting to crack a little and, you know, your partner becomes human again.
The book really lays out the 5 main love languages and what we can do to make sure the love tank within us and our partner remains full. I would love to really have an engaged discussion about this in the comments, but there aren't enough readers just yet.
How fascinating would it be though to listen to your experiences with different love languages in your relationships?
I think one common mistake is that we often apply what works for us to others. You don't have to look just at relationships for that. Take work!
I learned a long time ago, that I strive on being given more responsibility. Yes, it is lovely when my boss tells me I am doing a great job, but unless he's handing me a pay raise at the same time, I would rather him give me more trust and more responsibility. There. A good work relationship with your boss could be even better if you know this about each other.
I once had an employee who really "needed" me to check in with her frequently. I always felt I was the kind of manager who checked in plentifully, but I had a week or so where I didn't stop by her office for a chat. Well! When I did she wondered out loud whether she was doing a good enough job. I was flabbergasted because she was very good at her job and I realized that she needed a bit more personal time with me than other employees.
That was a very valuable lesson for me that I carry with me.
Now. Apply the same type of thinking to relationships. Food for thought. Improving what we have and continuing to value and learn our partner in ways that matter to our partner is where its at!